Hey guys.
It’s Lay.
I’m sorry that I wasn’t on media much but I just had a bad week and felt really burned out. I was going to still post last Sunday but I just couldn’t bring myself to finish it. So I figured since what I was writing last week and what I was planning to write this week was so similar that I’m going to combine it.
Before I do get this blog I want to say this post is mainly dedicated to Ricardo and Ariana because when this is uploaded it will be their birthdays (yes I have friends who share the same birthday that aren’t related). So if either of you are reading this, happy birthday and I can’t wait to celebrate this Tuesday.
So how I’m organizing this post is one celebrity reference , my personal experiences in the past, a influencer reference, how I feel about it now and of course gift ideas in the end. So let’s get to it and I hope you enjoy and share.
Celebrity reference
To start off what originally inspired me besides so many people’s birthdays being in October was what Jordyn Wood captioned her Instagram. I’m not really a fan of her or the Kardashian’s for that matter but being a public figure means things that typically happen in everyday life is just put on blast for everyone to see. It was just something that’s all over Snapchat and I do love to click through the news things especially when I’m bored.
I used it as an example in one of my former thoughts on blog so for the purpose of this blog because her birthday was September 23 (the start of libra season) , I’m going to use her an example again. In her Instagram for her birthday post she wrote “Can I be this little again? ”Birthdays have always been very emotional for me. It’s a time to reflect on your year and your life thus far. I appreciate every moment. The ups and the downs.In your downs you can really figure out who’s supposed to be there when you’re up.Thank you for all of the birthday wishes this is just the beginning”. Those words just made think about my own life, the people that I used to believe I lost but in reality they lost me, the people I’ve gain, all the times I thought a situation was gonna kill me because I just yet here I am still breathing and thriving better than I was in past years because I’m no longer forced to be in an environment that just drained me, made feel worthless. The picture she used was her as an little girl holding balloons which was very sweet. I miss my childhood in some ways. The workload was easier, things like race, politics, discrimination, sexism etc. wasn’t a problem because we just saw people... overall it was a happier time.
My birthday experiences
In some ways, my childhood wasn’t completely normal and I just didn’t do much for my birthday besides going out to eat. My largest birthdays were when I went to daycare, when I was turning 14 and went to Dave and Busters with a few friends and family and when I was 16 and I had a sweet 16. I’ll talk about my sweet 16 in another blog but as for now I’m just listening my largest celebrated birthdays that I remember.
My worst birthday was definitely when I was turning 17 because after I turned 16 there were so many turning points.
Before I get into why,I’m just going to do a quick comparison.
Right now, my emotional state clearly has been up and down. If you follow my Instagram or Twitter (both are simplylayxx and you should follow them if you haven’t already), I’ve been in a poor metal state and been having a lot of anxiety over what is going to happen in my life. In some ways I’m an overachiever, so when things don’t meet my standards , in my eyes I’m failing. Also, I’m having anxiety over the next stages in my life like the milestones: when I’m going to get a job, when am I going to get a car , when I’m going to move out, Will this blogging thing be a success etc. I guess from when I set up all these plans but there’s a part of me that doesn’t know if it will all work out. Funny enough I’m a lot happier than I was a year ago even with all the anxiety. I always had anxiety and I might always will but at least the drama that happened was left behind.
The reason I wanted to a quick comparison is because I’ve been looking at my snap memories around this time of year and I just felt so proud in the fact even though I’m going through things, I’m not at my lowest point. After so many friendship break ups, being lied to and not really having anyone in my life to trust and just feeling so paranoid, I would have to say there was a huge reason turning 17 was just terrible. I remember actually crying on my birthday because just one year ago my best friend and guy best friend were on the phone fighting over who got to wish me happy birthday first and then since both of them left my life at some point in 11th grade, I was just alone because I felt it. My ex best friend (who I am now friends with again), always stayed up FaceTiming me on my birthday and just throughout the day made it special by being extra and making it known it was my birthday. Before I met her I just didn’t care about my birthday because it felt like just another day to me. I didn’t view myself as important but she made sure to make my birthday important which is why I did start caring a bit more. As for my ex guy best friend, it was more of a complicated case because we’ve grown close in the beginning of 11th grade, we had our complications because how people thought we were together (there’s a reason that is bad and led to a lot of other issues) , which made things awkward at times. Of course it did happen that I eventually did get feelings for him but it wasn’t something I wanted to happen because I really did care about him as a friend but when you have a heart like mine if someone is sweet to you, have deep conversations with you and did flirt with you... you will fall so hard. I did so much to be there for him and to let him know how much I appreciate him being there for me especially on his birthday. I was planning to hangout with him the first place we hung out which was Dunkin’ and give him a birthday present. He was busy so I just gave him a birthday present. I got him red Ralph Lauren cologne (which he did use literally everyday even after he hurt me), a $50 visa gift card and a box chips ahoy cookies (that was a joke in our friendship because I wanted kit kat and I annoyed h to get me one but instead he got me a large box of chips ahoy cookies). Imagine putting so much time and effort into someone just to find out they were using you. Which reminds me of another person who I spent my entire summer 2018 with just to find out she had a crush on me, talked badly about out me after I confided in her about the drama with my ex best friend and ex best guy friend. As I said before , everything leading up to my 17 birthday was just so much drama and frustration. Of course I had other friends but they had there own things, at least 2 were absent on my birthday. One was sick and the other was missing school because her mom had a ceremony for a job. They both had valid reasons not to be there so I wasn’t upset them or anything. The one that came to school was sweet and got me a birthday gift but I didn’t see her much since we only had homeroom together in my senior year. Because the only friend I had in any of my classes was sick, the day was just really lonely and I felt invisible. The only person who said happy birthday to me outside my friends group was like 4 people including my ex best friend... my ex best guy friend didn’t say a word even though we had every single class together which further proved how bad of a person he was to just lie and manipulate me for his own gain. So the whole day I was regretting going to school. My mom was actually going to let me stay home because she came in my room in the middle of the night to wish me a happy birthday and to give me the birthday gift she ordered and when she came in I was literally sobbing and having a complete emotional breakdown over everything that happened since I turned 16. The look on her face that was on her face that I saw through my tears was literally so sad. Her expression was like her heart was broken for me and she hated seeing me how I was.
Influencer reference
Originally this wasn’t part of the blog I was writing but because this spoke to me I wanted to add it in. So basically whenever I’m at school and I have free time to work on some homework, I listen to Pretty Basic which is a podcast by Alisha Marie and Remi Cruz. They are my favorite youtubers at the moment because I love their energy and I just find them so inspirational. I’m late to the whole podcast thing so I’ve been listening to their podcast old to new and it’s crazy how I found one directly related to what I wanted to talk about. So it’s an old episode called Going out and getting hit on. It was on February 13 they posted this and at 16:19 when they started talking about Birthdays and Remchella. Remi loves birthdays and calls her birthday a worldwide holiday. She talks about how birthday parties are a time to bring people together, it’s not just about her. The reason why she wanted to throw a party again for 24th birthday (she threw one for her 22nd but only went to Vegas her 23rd) is because she feels like this is the happiest she’s been, that she’s surrounded by good people and everyone in her life wants the best for her . The way she was so happy for her birthday and wanted it to celebrate how happy she felt was amazing. Haters would see it as conceited but honestly there’s nothing wrong with celebrating how far you came.
My birthday this year
So as some of you may know it’s officially Libra season. I’m actually a libra since my birthday is October 22. This is a huge birthday for me because I’ll be turning 18 so I’ll be legally an adult which in my eyes, changes everything for me. I will finally be able to apply for jobs in retail since most of them require you to be at least 18, I can officially work out at the gym by my house since you need to be at least 18 and you can’t get parental permission there. For some, it seems ridiculous but the idea of certain things just makes me happy.On top of that I have plans all month since I know a lot of libras. On October 1st , I went out with Ricardo and his family to celebrate his mom’s birthday. On the 4th, I gave Ricardo an early birthday present, took him out to eat and we went around to different places. On the 7th me and my friend Angela are having a sleepover so me , her and Ricardo can celebrate Ariana’s birthday at Grand Lux. On the 11th, I’m going to New Jersey to spend time with my brother and cousins. We are going apple picking and he’s having a small dinner party. Then on the 18th - 20th, My friend and I are going to New Jersey again and going to fright fest that weekend. After that my actual birthday is that Tuesday. That weekend I’m not doing anything for my but going shopping for Friendsgiving. The weekend after that’s when my friends and I are celebrating my birthday and I don’t know what they’re planning but I’m excited.
After last year, it feels good to be excited again.
Gift ideas
Even though I list something for a specific gender, clearly the gift ideas aren’t limited to that one gender. I didn't want to go in this part because I also plan to do a gift blog over the holiday season when the time comes in December. Also I felt like this was a long blog already.
For girls
Makeup
Masks
Perfume
Jewelry
Teddy bear
For guys
Backpack
Cologne
Watches
Wallet
Sports gear
For anyone
Tickets to an event
Video games
Band merch
Book
Candles
If you got this far, I just wanted to thank you for reading and hopes this gave you some perspective, made you feel connected or even gave you some ideas on things you can give on someone's birthday. Be sure to share with your friends and family . Also don’t forget to subscribe so you never miss an update.
Until next time,
xoxo Lay 💋
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